She Power. She for He!

Some of you know that I am speaking at the inaugural SheTalks YVR event on March 7, 2015 in honour of International Women’s Day. This is going to be an AMAZING event with 15 inspirational women sharing their stories, messages and soulful beauty.

There will be fabulous vendors, yummy lunchboxes and sexy swag bags including $10 gift cards from Guilford Town Centre – what will you buy with yours?

I am super pumped to be a part of the Advisory Council working with some pretty KICK ASS women to bring this event to life. Our leader Natasha Raey has posed this question:  “What does ShePower mean for you?”

For me, ShePower is a gift and with every gift comes a responsibility.

For many decades women have walked before us, advancing our interests and giving us a VOICE. That is the gift.

Our responsibility lies in using this voice to create greater equality among ALL HUMAN BEINGS. To consider things more broadly with open minds and hearts.   ShePower is about leadership; using our gift wisely to have an impact on our greater world in a meaningful way.

In my work I help people create soulmate level connections with their work, their families, their communities and my most favourite part, their romantic partner. And it is through my work that I see gender equality as an issue for men just as much as women.

The difference is women tend to experience oppression in the physical and mental realms – pay and position equity, right to education, violence and lack of sexual dignity. These are real issues that still require attention so that we can continue to advance equality and respect for women globally.

However, what we often fail to recognize is, the oppression of men. 

The oppression of men happens in different realms; most notably, the emotional realm. Although it is not as easy to quantify, the impacts are real and because of my focus on how people ralate, I see a huge impact resulting in relationship failure or dissatisfaction. One that I believe contributes to a 49% divorce rate in North America.

For centuries men have had to “shut up,” “put up” “suck it up” “be a man” and hear messages like “only babies cry.” Men are socialized to believe a show of emotion is weak and not acceptable. We call our young boys “buddy,” “pal,” “man,” or “dude” to avoid any emotional weakness that might result from calling them, “baby,” “honey, “sweetie” like we call our girls.

Boys learn to push their emotions down; to simply avoid them.

The result is men that struggle to communicate and connect fully in the emotional realm.  This often results in connection issues with female partners who feel more comfortable in the emotion realm because they have been allowed to practice, exercise and experience open emotion without judgment.

Often the initial relationship bliss starts to tarnish when a woman’s desire for physical connection decreases because their need for emotional connection is not being met. However, men need to connect physically because it is often the only way they know how to feel connection. Both partners point finger indicating their needs are not being met and what is simply a lack of understanding and ability is assumed to be negative intent. Divorce attorneys rejoice!

But there is something beautiful emerging – because as woman, we now have a voice.

As a mother with a son I now have an influence. I am certain our mother’s generation did not have the same voice or impact to ensure their sons felt comfortable “feeling” and expressing their emotions. When our fathers told our brothers to “be a man” that was the end of the discussion.

As mothers, sisters, girlfriends or wives it is our responsibility to empower the boys and men in our lives to flex their emotion. To create space for them to practice without judgment.

I look to my children’s future with so much hope and anticipation knowing their relationships will be so much stronger and more connected as women step up and give men the hand up that they need –“She for He!”

She Power is about leadership. It is about having a GREATER understanding of the WHOLE picture. It is about taking action where it is required to advance ALL human beings to a place of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual equality, increasing connection and love among all.

And YES! Men are MOST WELCOME to attend SheTalksYVR…check out this post from our Founder Natasha Raey